Well, I suppose first thing’s first — Let’s get this introductory crap out of the way. I’m a step mom to a wonderful, sassy, and extremely smart 6 year old girl! She is the daughter of my boyfriend, and hopefully husband some day (let’s go dude 😉 ). I work in an IT department by day, and by night I’m whatever the little one needs me to be. Some days I’m mommy, some days I’m her human jungle gym, and then others she’d rather talk to anyone else but me! 🙂
Overall, we have a fantastic relationship and I believe it’s partially because I came into her life when she was 3 as a friend, and then stepped into the role of “Step Mom” when she was 4. I’m not going to touch on why her parents didn’t work out because to be honest – there’s no nice, or professional or even remotely civil way to telling the story. So moving on….
Oh and just an FYI – if you’re one of those tightwads who get offended by someone who occasionally swears, you should probably hit the X button in the upper right hand corner of your screen. Lemme know if you need help.. I’m in IT 😉
What’s the custody schedule? We get this question a lot and it’s usually followed by: “It looks like you guys have her all the time!” Well, we don’t have her all the time – we don’t even have her HALF the time. We have her every Wednesday, every other Thursday opposite of every other Weekend. Sounds confusing but it’s really not. What it’s also NOT is 50/50. BM refuses to allow 50/50 for reasons that are far too obvious.
I decided to start this blog to have an outlet – to be able to share every day struggles that I experience and to reach out to other step moms to let them know they’re not alone. It’s a tough line we have to teeter back and forth and some days it truly is a struggle. You say or do too much and right away there’s the “She’s over stepping her boundaries” – then you back off and right away it’s “She’s not doing enough – she doesn’t care about the child”. It’s all bullshit and WAYYY too easy to use as an excuse to complain.
I’d like to make it known, loud and clear though that this is NOT going to be a spot where I bash the BM. Thats not what this is for. Will I share frustrations? Possibly. Will I advocate however for Fathers Rights? ABSOLUTELY. I belong to a few of those groups on Facebook and the stories that I have read so far are heartbreaking and similar. My BF is a fantastic father and deserves to be treated equally the eyes of the court. Unfortunately, that isn’t the case. That’s a blog for another time though – Grey’s Anatomy is on so I’m out! Till next time!!
“Sometimes I’m the mess, Sometimes I’m the broom – and on the hardest days I have to be both.”